


And Through it all

by Newtmastical



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: M/M, Post-Nogitsune
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-16
Updated: 2015-02-16
Packaged: 2018-03-13 06:29:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3371294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Newtmastical/pseuds/Newtmastical
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>he couldn't stand to look at his dad when all that he could see was the damage the nogitsune did at the sheriffs office.  He couldn't see Melissa or Scott without remembering all the people that had died at the hospital, or Alison.  He couldn't be around everyone that he had hurt.  So that leads him to here. Sitting in front of Derek Hale's apartment complex</p>
            </blockquote>





	And Through it all

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts).



Stiles took a deep breath, trying to calm the trembling in his hands. He closed his eyes as he turned off the ignition in his jeep and unlocked the doors. He didn't know why out of all the places in beacon hills he chose here, all he knew is that he couldn't stand to look at his dad when all that he could see was the damage the nogitsune did at the sheriffs office. He couldn't see Melissa or Scott without remembering all the people that had died at the hospital, or Alison. He couldn't be around everyone that he had hurt. So that leads him to here. Sitting in front of Derek Hale's apartment complex on the verge of a panic attack. Stiles knew that his guilt was irrational, he knew that no one blamed him for what the nogitsune had done, but it didn't stop him from blaming himself. He opened the door to his jeep and let out a shuddering breath before walking up to the complex, taking the elevator up to the loft. When he stood before the huge industrial door to the apartment, he felt his courage melt away. What was he even doing there? Derek didn't even like him, and he defiantly wouldn't want to harbor Stiles pathetic ass. It wasn't like they were actually friends, sure they he had saved Derek's ass a few times, and Derek had saved his more times than he could count, but that didn't mean that they were friends or anything and the chances of Derek opening his door and pulling stiles into his apartment with the promise of comfort food and a heart to heart were as bout as great as the chances that Stiles would get a starting position on the lacrosse team. Nonexistent. Stiles raked a hand through his hair, letting out a defeated puff of air, and turned around fully prepared to return to his jeep and drive around town for the next six hours avoiding everyone and all of his problems. Like he said the best way to deal with things are to ignore them until they go away. He'd made it half way to the elevator when he heard the door scrape open.   
"Stiles?"  
This was ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous. He turned around to see Derek standing in the doorway. Stiles sighed and ran a hand through his hair.  
" Sorry for bothering you, I was just going..." He let the sentence die. Throwing his thumb over his shoulder in the general direction of the elevator. Derek raised an eyebrow, stepping out into the hall.  
"What are you doing here Stiles?" He crossed his arms assuming the classic 'sourwolf' position, or at least that's what Stiles liked to call it.   
"Me? Doing something? Nah I'm just...uh inspecting the walls, no termites here!" He patted the wall wincing at how stupid it sounded even to himself. Derek's eye brows practically disappeared into his hairline.  
"You do remember that I can tell when you're lying right?" He asked staring Stiles down. A shudder passed through Stiles, he felt like Derek's stare was ripping through him, tearing away each of the delicte walls that he built around himself. He was almost ashamed of the tears that pricked his eyes.   
"Right so I guess the truth is that I don't have anywhere else, I can't go anywhere else because everywhere I turn there's someone that I've hurt and I can't stand to see the pity on my dads face, or how Scott can't look me in the eye yet and I just can't take it anymore. Everything sucks." He raised a hand to wipe away the wetness on his cheeks but before he could Derek was there doing it for him, and then Derek's arms were around him, holding him to his chest because Derek understood. He got what it was like to feel guilt for something that wasn't your fault, what its like to have someone get into your head and manipulate you just so they get what they want. He understood what it's like needing to get away from the things that remind you of what you want to forget most, it's why he left for New York after the fire, and why he pulled Stiles into his apartment and sat him down on his bed. It's why when Stiles gripped his wrist silently asking him to stay that he climbed under the comforter with him and let him curl into his chest. Seeing stiles so broken hurt Derek on the inside and all he really wanted to do was put the boy back together, and that's why when Stiles leaned up to kiss Derek, tears brimming in his eyes, that he cradled his face and wiped away his tears. It's why when stiles pulled away he kissed every inch of skin on his face, and later kissed the rest of him because he knew what it was like to need to feel loved, and he was happy to be able to be the one to make sure Stiles always felt it.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! This was part of the secret valentines sterek edition on tumblr and was gifted to lyelack!! She has beautiful writing and you should go check it out! You can find me on tumblr at Newtmastical


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